okay i vented on the private blog and need to share the wealth with the world... so you think that things are fine at the office right - you bust your ass and work hard and think you're doing a pretty decent job - in fact you think you're doing a great job given the circumstances - you're performing at way more than 200% - and what do you get for it - told that you aren't doing enough - this has got to be bull!!! - not only that - stuff that you do in your free-time comes into question as interfering for why you aren't performing to peak for them - friggin - I've been working harder than most and putting in so much commitment - and then this? and worse yet - there are these secret people who are making up stories about you cause they haven't got a fuckin clue and think they do or perhaps they just want to turn the heat toward someone else - so they look more angelic - who knows - all I know is - there's some friggin idea that I spend all my time at work - working on freelance prjects - that i could support myself only doing that - which is such friggin bullshit!!! - that's why so many projects - of my real work get done - and that's why I friggin take real work home on the weekends and in the evenings to do people's friggin vacation calculations - and that's why i friggin check my work email in the middle of the morning and on weekends to get ahead - cause I'm not dedicated enough to my full-time job - what a crock!!!! furthermore - I've been given some loose mind-fuck ultimatum to come up with a "where I wanna be" with the company report...the question ought to be whether or not the company values me enough to want me to "be" At the moment it sure doesn't seem like it - and it's such a crock to think that my $20-$40/week gig is interfering with my foremost responsiblities....okay that's friggin enough - it's been a friggin emotional roller coaster day and I want off this ride already.